


Rules Are Overrated

by slightlytookish



Category: The Book of Mormon - Parker/Stone/Lopez
Genre: First Kiss, Getting Together, M/M, Post-Canon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-07
Updated: 2015-10-07
Packaged: 2018-04-25 06:56:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,537
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4950874
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/slightlytookish/pseuds/slightlytookish
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Elder McKinley twirls the feather between his fingers which, for some reason, spurs Elder Price into a choking fit. "May I ask what I was doing?"</p>
<p>Elder Price mumbles something that sounds suspiciously like, "More like <i>who</i>," but he's still coughing a little and Elder McKinley can't be sure that he heard correctly. </p>
<p>(In which Elder McKinley finally finds out that he was in Elder Price's hell dream).</p>
            </blockquote>





	Rules Are Overrated

**Author's Note:**

  * For [phantomreviewer](https://archiveofourown.org/users/phantomreviewer/gifts).



> So the last time I saw The Book of Mormon, during "I Believe," Elder Price took the book out of his pocket and a huge red feather fell out with it. My McPriceley-shipping heart was very happy and I just had to write a little something related to it :D 
> 
> For Phantomreviewer with thanks for all the encouragement!

They may not officially be on a mission anymore (though they are still waiting to hear back from the Mission President about whether they will be reinstated or not, even if it seems less and less likely that they will be, the longer that they wait) but most of the time they still act like proper Mormon missionaries. 

They still call each other Elder for one thing, and still tend to stick close to their mission companions especially when they venture outside (a sensible thing to do, because even though General Butt Fucking Naked and his men have all joined the church and are no longer a threat, there are still many other dangers in Uganda, like those safari ants that Nabulungi always likes to remind them about). And of course they still spend their time proselytizing, even if they turn to the Book of Arnold more often than not, these days.

But some of the rules are slowly but inevitably beginning to fall by the wayside. During the hottest part of the day several of the elders will often loosen or even remove their ties, and maybe a few of them are letting their hair grow a little longer than their parents or the missionary training center ever would permit. Certainly none of them are waking up at 6:30 in the morning any more, and Elder McKinley now turns a blind eye when he sees that the lights are still on in one of the bedrooms after midnight. For the most part, however, nothing has changed drastically. They are all a little too used to following the rules to let everything slide all at once. 

One thing they have managed to keep up with is their chores. A lifetime of wearing shirts that are clean and pressed does give a person certain standards to uphold. One of the first things Elder McKinley did as district leader was draw up a large chart listing all of the chores and the elders' weekly assignments. Stickers were involved, with each elder earning a small glittery star for each chore he completed, at least until Elder Price arrived and became so competitive about the chore chart that the stickers were quickly abandoned in favor of keeping peace in the mission house. Now the stickers are locked away in Elder McKinley's suitcase and there are no plans to bring them back, no matter how often he catches Elder Price staring forlornly at the chart. 

(Elder McKinley is not a pushover.

Not even for Elder Price, who somehow manages to be charming even when he is sulking over stickers, whose brilliant smile never fails to make Elder McKinley smile in return, whose perfect hair and beautiful eyes and handsome face are such trials to have to look at every single day… oh, who is he kidding? Certainly not himself.

But just _appreciating_ Elder Price's good looks isn't a bad thing, is it? It's just another way of acknowledging Heavenly Father's hand in everything, right? It's not like it's becoming a _distraction_.

…Though he supposes that he probably shouldn't feel a thrill whenever he hears Elder Price swear - something that happens as regularly now as Elder Price's morning coffee routine. It's quite frustrating, really, because Elder Price doesn't obviously break any of the other rules. He still goes out to proselytize (though Elder Cunningham usually takes the lead now, being the prophet and all), his tie is still neatly tied no matter how high the temperature soars, and he never has a hair out of place. Elder Price may still look like a Mormon poster boy but the way he chooses to break the rules _does things_ to Elder McKinley, gosh darn it.

Still. That doesn't make him a pushover and those stickers will not be making another appearance, no matter how Elder Price pouts.

Even if it is a very cute pout.

Not even _then_ ).

But even district leaders that definitely aren't pushovers still have chores to do, and it's Elder McKinley's turn to do the laundry this week. He's more meticulous about it than some of the others - Elder Cunningham, in fact, is permanently exempted from laundry duty after his first and only attempt somehow made the other elders' clothes look worse after washing than they had been before - and it is during his careful check of everyone's pockets that he finds the feather. 

As feathers go, this one is very odd. Elder McKinley doesn't consider himself an expert on birds, but the feather doesn't look like it could have come from any bird he has ever seen - it's too large, for one thing, and too oddly-shaped, and too... synthetic. Nor can he think of anything else that it may have come from. There is certainly nothing in the mission house that is quite so _red_. 

Elder McKinley looks inside the waistband of the pants. There, neatly printed, is a tag proclaiming that they belong to Elder Price, because _of course_ they do. 

For a fleeting moment, Elder McKinley wonders if he has somehow brought the feather into existence just by thinking about Elder Price. It's a ridiculous thought, he knows. But is it more ridiculous than converting the General by telling him that Joseph Smith torpedoes would turn him into a lesbian? Nothing could be more ridiculous than that, but somehow it had worked. If there's one thing Elder McKinley has learned on this mission, it's that nothing is too far-fetched to be the truth. 

He puts the feather aside, fully ready to ignore it, but his eyes keep drifting over to look at it as he goes through the other pockets. He probably should find out where it came from, shouldn't he? He's still the district leader, even if their district technically is shut down. It's his business to know, isn't it?

Abandoning the laundry in a heap, he goes to the door. Outside Elder Cunningham is surrounded by a group of children, all listening attentively as he reads from the Book of Arnold, "And lo, Elrond of Rivendell gifted Joseph Smith and Brigham Young with sparkly vests for their journey."

One little boy leans over to the girl sitting beside him. "They're going to meet the trolls soon."

"I hope they won't try to eat Brigham Young this time," the girl replies, looking concerned.

Sitting a little apart from the others are Elder Price and Nabulungi, clearly trying to keep the younger and more easily bored children occupied. Nabulungi, at least, is having some success but Elder Price has a pained expression on his face, which probably has something to do with the fact that one of the squirming toddlers has her fists buried in his hair. 

Elder McKinley watches as he tries to dislodge her, which only makes the child howl and yank on his hair even more. Elder Price winces and looks ready to howl himself, and that's when Elder McKinley decides to put him out of his misery and satisfy his own curiosity all at once. "Elder Price, may I see you for a moment?"

Elder Price shoots him a grin that's so dazzling that Elder McKinley actually has to hold onto the doorframe and catch his breath. Luckily, Elder Price is too busy eagerly handing the toddler to Nabulungi and practically running into the house to notice. "Do you need help with something, Elder McKinley?" he asks, trying to smooth down his hair as he follows him inside.

One bit of hair stubbornly refuses to go back into place and falls onto his forehead instead. Elder McKinley firmly ignores the way that the sight of it makes something flutter in his chest. "I wanted to ask you about this," he says, holding up the red feather.

Elder Price suddenly goes very, very pale. "Where did you get that?" 

"I found it in your pocket."

Just as quickly as he went pale, Elder Price turns very, very red and looks away, studying his shoes as if they are the most fascinating things in the world. Elder McKinley narrows his eyes.

"Is there something you'd like to tell me, Elder Price?" 

"Um," he says and, amazingly, blushes even harder. "No."

Elder McKinley draws himself up to his full height and puts on his best district leader voice. "Elder Price! Do I need to call a group meeting about this?"

"No, no! I just had a hell dream last night, okay?"

"Ah." Elder McKinley certainly can relate to that. He still has hell dreams too, though not every night like he used to, and for some reason they haven't been as horrific ever since their little misunderstanding with the Church. In fact, lately his dreams are often about him and Elder Price and - well, maybe he shouldn't think about them in too much detail right now with Elder Price standing right in front of him. Elder McKinley clears his throat and tries to ignore the flush he feels creeping up his neck. "I'm sorry to hear that, Elder Price. Was it very spooky?"

"No more than usual," he replies, and he still won't meet Elder McKinley's gaze. "Except, um, that thing was in it. Sort of."

"The feather?" 

Elder Price nods. "You were - I mean-" He breaks off, looking so horrified that Elder McKinley wishes he didn't have to ask but he really needs to know. 

"Was I in it?" He's asked this before, but they were interrupted by Elder Cunningham and he never found out the answer. 

But today Elder Cunningham is still outside with Nabulungi and the children - Elder McKinley can hear his voice through the still-open door, telling them all about Moroni's journey in the TARDIS, and there's no one to stop Elder Price from saying, "Yes."

"Huh." Elder McKinley twirls the feather between his fingers which, for some reason, spurs Elder Price into a choking fit. "May I ask what I was doing?"

Elder Price mumbles something that sounds suspiciously like, "More like _who_ ," but he's still coughing a little and Elder McKinley can't be sure that he heard correctly. 

"Pardon?"

Elder Price heaves a resigned-sounding sigh. "I've had this dream a few times now," he admits. "And you're always in it, wearing this sparkly red outfit and dancing around with a feather boa…"

And that doesn't sound too bad at all, Elder McKinley thinks - actually, he thinks it sounds kind of nice, at least until Elder Price adds, "…and thenyougiveHitlerablowjob."

He must have misheard Elder Price this time. He _must_ have. "I… I do WHAT?"

Elder Price looks miserable and his face is bright red and Elder McKinley's cheeks feel like they're _on fire_ but no, he hasn't misheard him at all. "You, um, you give Hitler a blow job." 

Elder McKinley usually isn't at a loss for words but now he's stunned into silence. It takes him a few tries, and his mouth opens and closes more than once before he manages to speak. "Gosh, Elder Price, that's… I mean…"

"Yeah," Elder Price says. They're both determinedly not looking at each other.

Finally Elder McKinley pulls himself together. "I'm sorry you had to see that, Elder Price."

"It's not your fault."

"All the same, it certainly had to be a very disturbing experience for you. No wonder you're so upset, Elder." He's sorry he brought it up at all, sorrier still that he was so insistent about learning the truth, and he's ready to leave the room and quite possibly resolve to never look Elder Price in the face again when he feels a hand on his arm.

"It's okay, really," Elder Price says, and when he dares to glance up Elder Price offers him a smile. The fact that Elder Price is trying to comfort him, despite everything, makes Elder McKinley's heart beat a little faster and he has to remind himself to keep listening. 

"Believe me, there are a lot more disturbing things in my hell dreams. Like my dad…" He trails off with a shudder and Elder McKinley knows better now than to ask for any more details. 

"And from the, ah, angle I never can see that much so it didn't really bother me. I mean, the fact that it was Hitler and not me was a bit-" Elder Price stops, looking shocked at himself. The hand still resting on Elder McKinley's arm suddenly feels very clammy. 

Elder McKinley's heart is beating so loudly now that he's sure Elder Price can hear it. "Elder Price have you… have you been having gay thoughts?"

For a moment, it looks like Elder Price is going to deny it. "I - I don't - that is - oh, fuck it-" and Elder McKinley really, _really_ , shouldn't find that as hot as he does - "Yes. I have."

"Oh," he says softly. He's vaguely aware that Elder Price is still holding his arm and he kind of feels like he's going to hyperventilate at any moment because there's absolutely no polite way to ask what he wants to ask. Nonetheless, he plows ahead. He's asked enough impolite questions already this afternoon, what's one more? "So unless I'm completely misunderstanding this, are those thoughts… about me?"

Elder Price's answering laugh sounds just as hysterical as Elder McKinley feels. "Yeah, that whole turning it off thing isn't really working for me."

"Good," Elder McKinley says before tugging Elder Price into a kiss. 

It's not exactly an elegant kiss, with their noses barely missing each other and Elder McKinley having no idea what to do with his hands so he ends up clutching the front of Elder Price's shirt. There's also the little matter of Elder Price not kissing him back, which is incredibly awkward. Elder McKinley is about to pull away when Elder Price suddenly draws him closer and finally, _finally_ kisses him back. 

He's been fantasizing about kisses since his Steve Blade years but nothing could have prepared him for this, for the soft press of Elder Price's lips against his own and his hands resting solidly on his back and the feel of his heart beating underneath Elder McKinley's palm. His knees actually feel weak, and the whole thing is overwhelming enough that Elder McKinley just wants to laugh from the sheer joy of it all. He can't help smiling into the kiss, but that's okay because he can feel Elder Price doing the same before they finally break apart.

"So," Elder Price says once they've both managed to catch their breaths. "I guess that's another rule broken." He actually looks a little hesitant in a way that Elder McKinley has never seen before, as if Elder Price is half-expecting him to laugh and call the whole thing off. 

He's usually so confident and sure of himself that the expression looks strange on his face, and Elder McKinley decides that he never wants to see that look of uncertainty again, at least not when it comes to this new, wonderful thing that's growing between them. He takes both of Elder Price's hands in his own and offers him a reassuring smile. 

"Rules are overrated," Elder McKinley says, and he barely has a chance to take in the look of relief and uncomplicated happiness on Elder Price's face before he's swept up in another kiss.


End file.
